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\"\"<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

This is not to be confused with deceptive click-bait leading you to think I have the secret to staying alive in this health crisis. Heck if I know \u2013 I don\u2019t even think Dr. Fauci really knows. Me? I\u2019m sitting all alone in a cabin sucking on oranges, doubling up on multi-vitamins, and binge-watching TV COVID updates like it\u2019s the new season of Stranger Things. My only human interaction is shouting across the yard to my drunk hippy neighbors and FaceTiming the kids.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

No, the nature of this post is quite the opposite of how to stay alive.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Let\u2019s be honest, every one of us – at some point since hearing about this deadly virus – has thought about dying. Who wouldn\u2019t? This thing is a killer and whether we believe it or not, we will all be touched in some grisly way by this virus. I don\u2019t think any of us were ready to be thrust into morbid conversations about sickness, PPE, viral load, pandemics, and a TV-ticker that literally counts the dead. Yet suddenly EVERY stinkin\u2019 one of us has to concern ourselves with the reality that \u201cit\u201d could be coming for us. Even us.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Generally speaking, our culture is not all that adept in dealing with dying. We value LIFE! YOUTH! ACTION! STRENGTH! and don\u2019t give much credence to the reality of sickness, tragedy, suffering and the inevitable end to our existence. We like to put old people in homes so we don\u2019t have a daily reminder of our own mortality. We would rather pour our hard earned money into removing our facial wrinkles, coloring over our grey hair and adding long, lush eyelashes as opposed to taking care of grandma. We prefer to minimize, ignore, or even deny the reality of death.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I know I did, anyway.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That was, until I had no choice but to deal with it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019ve had a head start on the general population to contemplate death when I was diagnosed with a really crappy lung disease about six years ago. Early on, the prognosis was grim with most websites giving between 5-15 years to live. I\u2019ve been extremely fortunate and it seems my disease progress is on the slower end of that spectrum. Still, I\u2019ve given a lot of thought to my death and how to die well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Morbid, I know. But I was recently brought back to some of the most powerful insights on dying from Morrie Schwartz as he shared them with his former student, Mitch Albom in Albom\u2019s book \u201cTuesdays with Morrie.\u201d This is my favorite:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhen you know how to die, you know how to live.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Isn\u2019t that brilliant? Perhaps if our culture WOULD give more thought and discussion to dying, perhaps we\u2019d live BETTER! Let\u2019s not miss this opportunity the coronavirus has given us to stare down death and ask ourselves, do I know how to die? And therefore \u2013 do I know how to live?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When I received my LAM diagnosis, I came up with many things I wanted to do differently with my truncated life. Anyone who knows me knows I\u2019m totally a work in progress, but when I was handed an approximate expiration date, I was forced to evaluate my preparedness to exit this reality. I came up with several ways I knew I did NOT want to die:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n

Angry<\/u><\/strong> \u2013 You know that feeling when your heart is racing, your stomach is churning \u2013 nearly to the point of vomit – and you break into a cold sweat whenever you see that certain person or even hear their name? You know what I\u2019m talking about? Yeah, that. I definitely don\u2019t want to die with any of that in me.<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n

\n

Unforgiving<\/u><\/strong> \u2013 I\u2019m sure you\u2019ve heard it said that unforgiveness is like drinking poison and hoping the other person dies. No way would I want to take that kind of toxicity to the grave with me. I\u2019m still working on reaching out to all the people I\u2019ve struggled to forgive in my life. I wasn\u2019t able to forgive my dad for the hurt he caused me before he died \u2013 and I grieve that critical omission to this day. Forgiving is an important work. But it is work.<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n

\n

Afraid<\/u><\/strong> \u2013 Am I afraid of this virus? Heck yeah. I once heard pastor Ed Dobson, who was dying of ALS, say: \u201cI\u2019m not afraid of dying. I\u2019m afraid of the getting dead.\u201d Exactly. The only way we can go into that dark night \u2013 whether that be this week, next week or thousands of weeks from now \u2013 without fear is to know our eternal salvation is secure, to be able to say, \u201cMy soul is good, I\u2019m ready to go.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n

\n

Bitter<\/u><\/strong> \u2013 This is the ugly twin sister to unforgiveness. But bitterness can actually CAUSE high blood pressure, ulcers, stomach issues and lost sleep. I know I don\u2019t want to DIE with bitterness in my soul \u2013 but even moreso, who would want to LIVE like that? People can spot if we\u2019re bitter even from outside a 6 ft. social distance. And it\u2019s so unbecoming. No one wants to hang around bitter people \u2013 not in life or death. Lord, take my bitterness away.<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n

\n

Rich<\/u> <\/strong>\u2013 One thing I know is that those who die with lots of money, still die. And having an accountant husband I\u2019ve learned it\u2019s practically a sure thing that when the rich die, they WILL leave behind seismic family feuds and division amongst the children. Who would WANT that for their offspring? I don\u2019t want to die with any money \u2013 I think life is best lived by giving away as much as humanly possible. I just read this article<\/a> about the Rohingya refugees fleeing persecution in Myanmar. There is little doubt COVID-19 will destroy them when it enters their camps. Our money is about all that can help them right now. There must be at least a million different ways we could use our money right now. Come on, Christians \u2013 let\u2019s BE the church!<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n

\n

Alone<\/u><\/strong> \u2013 Worse than actually dying from COVID-19, I\u2019m more afraid of gasping for my final breaths all alone in the ICU without Paul or my kids at my side. The fact that visitors are not allowed in hospitals at all anymore feels like a big win for satan as his tactic is always to isolate then destroy. I\u2019ve even decided that should I contract the virus, I\u2019m gonna stay home until I recover or succumb. I want my people with me. I know the proper Christian response is that with Christ, I\u2019m never truly alone. I know that. But that doesn\u2019t seem real or helpful right now. I\u2019ve worked in the ICU. I know what a lonely place it is even when your family MAY visit. I don\u2019t want to go there now. Hell no. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I guess I\u2019m learning just how precious and priceless my people are. Sometimes they are even Jesus to me. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Also \u2013 As the whole freakin\u2019 world is experiencing the coronavirus, I think it has reminded us of just how globalized our world is and how all humanity is connected.  I\u2019ve often wondered if Jesus was waiting for the internet before returning because he WANTED us to know global connectedness. Jesus was clear in the greatest commandment, \u201cLove the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your mind and with all your strength. And the second is this: to love your neighbor as yourself.\u201d I wonder if Jesus has been waiting for us to see that the WHOLE WORLD is our neighbor. We must love ALL humanity, not just those who look and think and act just like us. We will never be alone if everyone is a brother or sister.<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n

\n

Bored<\/u> <\/strong>\u2013 I\u2019m not all that proficient at social media, but even I found about 100 ways one could get involved in bringing hope and peace and comfort in the midst of this COVID-19 storm. One of the best ways to find meaning in this life is to lay down our own agendas and serve others. There is no better time than now to begin. The need is astronomical. Lord, forgive us for using the word \u201cbored\u201d in the midst of a rampant humanitarian crisis. We have all been created on purpose for a purpose \u2013 and the most fulfilling, God-glorifying thing is to find that purpose.<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n

I know it\u2019s hard to talk about death at such a somber time in history, but let us remember, thinking about dying can inform how we LIVE!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Today, I\u2019m still here. You\u2019re still here \u2013 so let\u2019s LIVE ALL-IN! Let\u2019s not waste these precious days with mind numbing nothingness. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

May we never forget that every single day and every single breath are just God-breathed gifts so that when we die (not if) we will be able to say, “I’ve lived well.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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