Comments on: When Is It Time To Let Me Die?

By: Cindy DeBoer

Cindy DeBoer — Mon, 18 May 2020 20:07:01 +0000

Hi Darla – I just noticed your post so my reply is a bit delayed. I truly appreciate the quote you pose – (and wish everyone would ask of themselves): “Is my desire for personal comfort more important that someone’s life?” And I know when that question is considered, people will respond with: “Not working for 3 months IS uncomfortable!” But still, I don’t buy it. I’ve been privileged to see first hand what suffering in developing countries looks like – America doesn’t have any idea what suffering really is. Inconvenienced by this virus? Absolutely. Causing some financial pain? Probably true for many. Bored, lonely and sad? Yep – true for most of us. But SUFFERING??? Nope – I just don’t buy it. Like you said, we are to “die to self” – completely surrendering our own agenda’s trusting God’s plan is always best. Even if that means we suffer.

By: Cindy DeBoer

Cindy DeBoer — Mon, 11 May 2020 00:09:12 +0000

In reply to Sandy G..

Oh my Sandy! These are such beautiful and constructive words! Thank you so much! I think of Mandy often and how she is in a similar situation as me. And my heart just aches for her. I know that I have issues because I can see that MANDY’s life is worth the fight against this virus (including an indefinite quarantine!) but I can’t consent to MY life being worth it. Okay… now I can really see how badly I need a therapist!!! Anyway, I do agree with your sentiments that we need to fight against the evils of this world – whether they are a result of the coronavirus or not – like abuse, suicide, lack of food, homelessness, etc. and realize our mandate, whether in the midst of a pandemic or not, is to take care of the least of these. That, I feel called to do and am eternally committed to! Thank you for your precious reminder of all good things. Peace.

By: Sandy G.

Sandy G. — Sun, 10 May 2020 20:32:32 +0000

Cindy – we have never met but you know my sister Mandy T (DGKT). She shared this article with me. Thank you for writing it. I think you put into words what many in your situation, including Mandy, are feeling. It really resonated with me.
First, let me say this clearly: Your life is worth any inconveniences that we are currently experiencing. My sister’s life is worth it. My mother’s life with COPD is worth it. My mother-in-law’s life as she is receiving rehab in a nursing facility is worth it.
Second, you should not feel guilty! Guilt implies that you have done something wrong. You have done nothing wrong. You have no control over other’s actions. Those of us who are following the safety protocols recommended by respected health officials are generally doing this out of our sense of responsibility to our fellow humans. I am doing it for those I care about but also for those I don’t even know. This is my choice for a purely selfish reason. I cannot imagine my life without my sister in it. I will not, knowingly, be the reason someone else has to face that situation.
I agree that there are issues that we are facing during the shelter in place – domestic abuse, mental health, and food and financial insecurity. Rather than fighting with each other about a virus that is not Republican, Democratic or even Chinese, we should, instead, be fighting these issues. We can volunteer at, or make a donation to, a food bank. We can call and check on our friends and neighbors. We can meet them for a walk – wear a mask and keep our distance. We can help connect them with the resources they need. This is where our energy should be spent, in taking care of each other.
Thank you for your honesty in writing this article. Please stay safe. I, for one, will be doing my part to help.

By: Cindy DeBoer

Cindy DeBoer — Sun, 10 May 2020 18:45:05 +0000

In reply to Ruth. Oh Ruth! Thank you so much for these powerful words. I agree wholeheartedly. In my heart I KNOW my life is worth as much as anyone else's, but cognitively, this whole coronavirus has started really messing with me. I'm not sure anymore that I'm worth the things some people are saying I'm (representing the sick and elderly) are causing. I love your thoughts of just living by the mantray of what would Jesus have me do? If we ask ourselves that every day, and we feel confident that it aligns with scripture and Jesus' own actions, then we go forth and do it! I love how you shine for the kingdom. Blessings!

By: Ruth

Ruth — Sun, 10 May 2020 16:02:30 +0000

“Is it time for me to die?” Those words bring tears to my eyes. I worked with terminally ill persons for 25+ years; I heard those words expressed. Life is precious. All lives. Each life. No one should have to voice them. More than that, no one should ever feel they need to die for the convenience of another. You’ve raised important points & thought-provoking questions, neither of which can be easily addressed or answered.
This is a time unprecedented in our life-time, our world, our nation, our communities, families, and ourselves individually. There is much unknown, including the multi-faceted, far-reaching, & long-lasting effects of the sheltering-in-place & business shut-downs. Sadly, politics & partisanship have further complicated it. Truth is hard to find. Emotions run high, opinions cause division, and people, ultimately, are both the culprits & the victims.
All lives matter. Yours as much as mine, & both of ours as much as anyone else’s. Are you an inconvenience to some? Yes–and so am I, and so are all people, in some way, to someone. Inconvenience is a part of relationships and of life on this earthly soil. But no man is an island–we all are earth’s inhabitants, interdependent and deserving of equal consideration; yea, each life is worth sacrificing for. The shut-down isn’t only to protect the vulnerable, it’s also to protect the average person; and ultimately, to hinder the spread of the virus. You needn’t feel guilty as the cause of it; neither are you to blame for the resulting consequences and whatever casualties occur, whether the wealth or the health of others.
I recall the wording on bracelets which were a fad some years ago– “What Would Jesus Do?”. Perhaps we should re-word that, and ask “what would Jesus have me do?” Sacrifice led our Savior to the Cross–what is it He asks of me?

By: Cindy DeBoer

Cindy DeBoer — Sat, 09 May 2020 19:21:09 +0000

In reply to Shelly Bos.

Thank you, Shelly! Yes, I agree that we all have a part to play in this – whether that be working on the front lines in a hospital, searching for a vaccine, simply wearing our masks or even sewing masks, or just staying HOME – we can and must do our part! As limited people, we need the whole body of Christ to show up and do our part. Thank you for that beautiful sentiment! God bless you, too!

By: Cindy DeBoer

Cindy DeBoer — Sat, 09 May 2020 19:18:44 +0000

In reply to Kathryn Christensen.

Dearest Kathryn – These words from you mean so much – as you are MY teacher and guide! Thank you for all you do to share Christ-like love with all those who know you! And yes, as always, let’s keep speaking the truth in LOVE!!

By: Cindy DeBoer

Cindy DeBoer — Sat, 09 May 2020 19:17:17 +0000

In reply to Scott Stankavage.

Wow. Beautifully said, Scott. And SO what I needed to hear at this time! “… to let go of expectation for a care-free life and death, we begin to perceive what a privilege it is to suffer IN Christ…” Oh man. I need that reminder every day. Thank you so much for sharing!

By: Scott Stankavage

Scott Stankavage — Sat, 09 May 2020 19:05:05 +0000

In reply to Laura. I lost my mom to cancer August 2019. We spent last two weeks bedside in hospice. She had 15 grandchildren around here that week. Out finiteness does not allow us to understand the infinite God or His dictionary. Yet His grace is enough, somehow. My terminal leukemia battle has taught me and my children and grandchildren that suffering exposes our Christ-like-ness, or not. And if we can let go of expectation for a care-free life and death, we begin to perceive what a privilege it is to suffer IN Christ, because we realize we are going to share in glorification WITH Christ on the other side of this fleeting life. As I lay near death from inhale to exhale after a bone marrow transplant, Christ was all there was in that utter darkness. Now recovered, I can share that I believe we as humans can go through anything IN Christ hanging on to His guarantee of being in His presence forever. As we give in to that totally submitted and committed faith where thee are no explanations to comfort us rationally, and best of all, there are no explanations needed. With love to Cindy and her family, I promise my prayer to our Almighty and Sovereign God. Amen. And AMEN. SCOTT

By: Cindy DeBoer

Cindy DeBoer — Sat, 09 May 2020 01:21:26 +0000

In reply to Mitchell Bakker.

Hey Mitch – Well, I’m half done with you book and so now I take your feedback with MORE credence than ever! You can write, my friend! And yes, this was a painful blog to write because I have been stuck in a painful place for several weeks now. This whole thing just sucks, doesn’t it? And though my soul aches and I have no answers, I do still trust in God’s sovriegnty and that He alone can be trusted and I certainly do trust His number of my days! Peace, my friend.